One Hundred and Eight (108)

108 I love you so much and I think about you every single day.  I never saw this coming for your life.  I only saw what I wanted for you, I only saw what I thought was best from my perspective.  Though I knew you were crying out to be understood – under all the chaos and the inability to express your pain.  I saw moments of you trying so hard to live the way everyone else wanted you to live, yet you struggled to get through each day.  I would ask myself, why is that you could not see the beauty God has granted you with? Not just in your outward appearance, but why couldn’t you see the beauty in your intelligence, the beauty in how you cared about family, the beauty in the sentiment you grant to others in general and the beauty in how you care about the people you consider to be your friends?

At this moment, I believe that the voice you have, will be heard by many.  You are such a stand up person, who does not back down for the truth and I know that someday YOUR TRUTH will be heard.  You will be a voice for many.  Though I realize that you have to see this for yourself and I may be guilty of flaunting my perspective once again, I am also hopeful and believe “That all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 – I cannot help thinking that you are called.

This song makes me think of you, it fills my heart with hope for you and for others.  It also fills my heart with hope for myself.  The song makes me realize that beneath what your face shows, there is always something deeper in your heart.  Sometimes it can be so challenging for you to verbalize your feelings because you just don’t know how too or you may fear what other’s reaction may be, then you think that they will not understand and judge you unfairly, we have all certainly been through that.

I pray that you will continue to grow.  Please forgive those who have hurt you, forgive those who you trusted to guide you instead disappointed you and forgive yourself.   When you think that no one cares, reel in those thoughts because they are false.  So many people do care about you and love you.

Things just happen and it is no ones fault, instead of blaming someone spend that time and energy healing and getting involved in a network of strength and courage.

Above all, God only knows AND 108, He knows you…







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